Indescribable Joy

Well, it’s been a while. A month and a half of lots of ups, plenty of downs, some in-betweens, new adventures, endless to-do lists, a life abundant in change, and a heart lavished with blessings and joy.

And as I sit here, all I can really do is breathe and recognize that, God is good.

So much is overwhelming my heart right now. The joy of the Lord has never been so present in my life and for that, I am beyond grateful. There was a while where I felt like I had been robbed of my joy, like a thief had come in the night and just taken it. I ran after that stolen joy as fast as I could, but I could never quite catch up. I was always left in the dust, panting for air, hoping to find something around me to satisfy this so-called “loss.” Now, I won’t knock myself too hard here, but I was looking in the wrong places. I was holding onto too much of the life that I wanted, the life that I thought I should have, instead of submitting to the Lord’s will for my life.

But the harsh reality of this slapped me in the face pretty dang good and then pushed me into the sweet of embrace of our loving and gracious God. So, after months of battling a deep heartache that can’t even be described, I found myself in a position of completele submission. I took my hands off the wheel and trusted that I would not be forsaken.

For someone like me; the planner, the organizer, the thinker, the doer, letting go of all control should have been the biggest challenge. BUT, it proved to be the most wonderful, freeing, and joyful experiences. I was humbled and I was broken by this experience, but the peace and the joy that now follow me are so amazing, I find the experience indescribable.

During the many months of uncertainty, hopelessness, and messy heartache, I found my constant in this: “Blessed is she who believed that The Lord would fulfill His promises to her.” – Luke 1:45

What beautiful words to remind us that God wants to fulfill the deepest desires of our hearts, He longs to provide for his children in radical ways, He delights in our joy, and He loves us more than we could ever even begin to fathom.

I couldn’t even begin to list all of the blessings I have been showered with over the past month, but I will say, I am thankful. I am happy. What an indescribable joy so pure, it could only be considered a gracious gift from God.